


The Other Side: Part Four

by PiscesPenName



Series: The Other Side Series [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Caring Dean Winchester, F/M, Sexual Dysfunction, Tantric Sex, Vaginismus, vulvodynia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-11
Updated: 2017-05-11
Packaged: 2018-10-30 05:27:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10870071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PiscesPenName/pseuds/PiscesPenName
Summary: Carrie and Dean try something a little different to take the pressure off of him. Tantric sex.





	The Other Side: Part Four

 

"Spiritual side, huh?" Dean asked, his long legs still crossed. "I'm not so into the mumbo jumbo stuff, baby. Now the sex part I can get behind." 

Carrie had gotten off of him and had leaned back against the mile of blankets and pillows piled into the middle of their foam mattress. "But..." she nudged his knee with her toe flirtatiously. "Don't you feel a connection?"

"Well yeah. Definitely." Dean reached for his beer and took a swig. She watched the lines of his throat move with his deep swallow. He put his other hand over her errant foot and rubbed his thumb under her arch.

"It's just that connection on a spiritual level."

He furrowed his brow. "Spiritual like how?"

"Just awareness and syncing each other's breath. It's not a big marathon sac session the end result isn't orgasm."

"Oh, see, now where is the fun in that? "

Carrie's face fell a little. "Don't you like just touching me?"

He tightened his grip on her foot and dragged her toward him. She squeaked and he looked satisfied as he hauled one leg over his lap and took another swig of beer.

Carrie laughed and set her head back on the mattress staring at the knotty pine ceiling. Dean was absently massaging her captured calf. She supposed maybe she should feel awkward being totally nude with him sitting around chatting. But she didn't. Dean made her feel..safe. Safe and appreciated.

"I love touching you. He said. I'll put my hands anywhere on your body you want."

"It's supposed to be really sexy. It sounds really sexy and it doesn't matter if neither of us can really get it on right now."

Dean's hand stilled. "Yeah."

"Just try it with me."

"We ain't gonna be saluting the sun or anything weird?"

She pulled her leg off his lap and gave him a pout. Pretty pink lip stuck out, blue eyes turned up for maximum effect. "You always said you'd do _anything_ I want, anything I need." She traced her palm over her breast.

She watched his eyes watch her. "Oh that's not fair."

"I need you to try this with me." She nudged him with her foot. "I want you to try this with me."

"Okay, okay." He settled his body over hers and kissed her softly. "Okay you win. What's the words to the sun salutations?"

* * *

 

Dean sat up, cross-legged; Carrie settled in his lap, facing him. They were aligned closely. His belly against her belly, his chest against her breasts. His hands on her hips, hers on each broad shoulder.  "Breathe slowly," she said, looking into his green eyes. "Just breathe."

He took a deep inhale and let it out slowly. As he exhaled she inhaled his breath. Dean blinked, watching her in fascination. "That's what we're doing?" He asked. "Just breathin?"

"Yes." She replied with a smile. "You inhale my breath, I inhale yours. Just start with that."

"Kay." He did it again and after a moment they fell in sync. The expansion of his chest felt nice against her. She closed her eyes and focused on feeling his energy. Dean kept it up for the space of several minutes and eventually Carrie could feel him drop the judgment and relax into it.  She ran her hands over his back and his breath hitched a little before he settled back into his easy rhythm.

"This it?" He asked.

"Patience."

He pulled her to him a little tighter.

She tipped her head. "I can feel all your energy down in your pelvis." 

 He gave her his little smirk. "Where's it supposed to be?"

"Your whole body." She pulled away a little and slowly ran her hand up his body. "Let me move it up."

He snorted "Okay."

He watched her with a little amusement. She visualized moving it up into his belly, up to his chest. She touched her hand to his sternum.

His face twitched a little. "I think I feel that."

"Yeah?"  She asked, leaning in to kiss his neck.

His breathing hitched. "Yeah. It's weird."

She moved her hand up, pulling his energy with it in her mind. Truth is she had no clue what she was doing, only what she'd read and listened to in a few meditation courses. 

She pictured it in his throat. Then up again into his crown chakra.  Dean's face twitched.

He breathed again and she felt him exhale some tension.

"Look at me," she said.

He opened his eyes and locked gazes with her. She kissed him softly and then pulled back, keeping the eye contact.

They didn't speak, just held the gaze. His eyes were so mesmerizingly beautiful. Moss green, with little speckled variations in them. Dark curling lashes. God, he was the most gorgeous thing she'd ever seen and here he was with HER. The thought made her feel a bit heady. She rubbed her hands over the smooth skin on his back and synced her breathing to his again. He fell into the rhythm with her again, his hands caressing her hips. She rocked gently into him.

She saw his pendant move with the motion. She brushed it aside and kissed where it usually lay. Dean stuttered a soft cry.

She felt a huge surge of affection for him. For all of him. His big heart, his bravery, his kindness, his mischievous edge. She loved him-- wanted to say it, knew it was entirely inappropriate. She leaned her head back and gently undulated with him, feeling the heat pool between her legs. His fingers went between them and he rubbed the outside of her with the heel of his hand. She watched his skin slide against her dark blonde pubic hair, his fingers teasing her labia. She took his hand away from her thighs and slid her fingers in between his own, still rocking, still keeping his eyes snared with hers. His pupils had dilated with his arousal. But she could still feel that ALL of him was engaged with her, caught in the moment.

And she felt him suddenly hardening under her, not fully, but engorging. She kept a hold of his hands and his eyes and kept her gentle rocking. She felt his legs start to tense under her. "Hey," she whispered.

He blinked. "Yeah?"

"Stay with me, baby. Feel all of me with you." She said softly.

His fingers tightened in hers. "Oh, Carrie." His voice held a little whine to it that shot straight to her groin. "Carrie...uh..." he moved with her.

She wanted him in her but at the same time wanted to prolong this connection. She tightened her legs around his waist and then went back to breathing and let go of his hands. He looked a little shocked at the loss of contact until she wrapped her arms around him and pressed all of herself to him. His arms went around her and she felt his body against hers, warm solid, growing slightly damp, even the little points of his horned pendant were a gentle prickle on her left breast. She squashed her nipple against the solid muscle of his pecs and their lips joined softly. She swallowed his breath as he exhaled and his eyes fluttered shut. He kept the gentle rocking. He was definitely growing hard now. She could feel an insistent little press of his penis against her thigh.

His plush lips opened in a surprised moan as he felt some unvoiced pleasure. She felt his penis twitch with it. He was feeling _something,_ she could tell. Could feel it pooling between the both of them. His nipples hardened against her. She kept her lips against his, not giving him any quarter to escape the contact. Skin against skin, head to toe. And her heart open and and the energy between them.

She could feel the thud of Dean's heart, his sweat against her palms pressed against his back.

"Carrie." He said into her mouth. She kept her lips to him. Gentle. Then pressing just a little more and swallowing his moan and suddenly she could feel a crash of energy come out of him, and her own belly clenched as he cried out. And she felt a warmth between her legs. Her heart skipped a few thudding beats.

"Dean," she whispered. They rode it out together as it spiraled down but not out like she'd experienced with other orgasms, the desire was still there. Dean's erection was still against her thigh. He put his hand in her hair and kissed her deeply before pulling away.

"What...what was that?" His voice rough and hushed.

"Did you come?" She asked.

"Kinda..." He crushed her to him affectionately.

She let her hand wander down between them and took his penis, tried to nudge it to her opening. Even relaxed and open as she was she could feel the pull the minute she lined the head up.

"C'mere." He put his hands under her arms and tilted their weight so that she was laying against the mattresses under him. He pushed her legs open just a little, settled in, she could feel the familiar beginnings of wanting to close them before he'd even begun to line himself up. He wasn't at full size yet, sort of half stiff. He touched himself for a second. "I'm not sure this will work yet, baby."

"It will work," she said. "Stop thinking about it, okay. Just move with me."

He nodded.

She ground against him and he ground back. He held himself planked over her, his penis half hard between her legs. She took him in her fingers. It elicited a gasp at her touch. She rubbed him for a second, reveling in the unique feel of it. The spongy firmness. --Decided she loved him and this part of him even like this. Soft or hard or in between. She loved Dean.

She took her fingers and started to try to pull him into her. She'd only been penetrated by Dean once before almost a year ago so she wasn't sure about the logistics. Dean held himself still, let her try to do it. She breathed relaxed, tried to think about taking him in her. She paused when she felt the familiar burn at her entrance and gritted her teeth. He was pliable like this, not as big. She squeezed him and pushed into herself, suppressing a whimper at the pain. She tried to leave him in and get her fingers out. It hurt. She froze, edged out but felt him starting to be pushed out with her.

Dean reached between them, grasped the base and slowly started to splint himself and stuff himself further in. She felt her legs start to shake with the pain of it. Dean leaned to whisper in her ear. "Stay open, baby."

She felt herself cramp a little tried to keep control of her breathing. "Put your legs around my back," He coached.

She brought them up and hooked them around as best she could. Dean's hands were behind her back and head and he pulled them both up into a sitting position, her in his lap. He almost succeeded in keeping them joined but she felt him pop out. He got himself comfortable. And settled her on him, lining her up again and pushing into her. He had grown a bit stiffer and this time he went in easier but the pain took her breath and she cried out and clung to him.

"Okay. Okay sweetheart." He soothed, hand in her hair. "Shhhh. When you're ready, just lower yourself down on me."

She bit her lip and eased down a little further. And further until she was impaled on his lap. He remained still and looked her in the eye.

"Breathe with me." He whispered.

She synced her breath. His hands slid over her back and down her arms. He was so gentle with her. He kept still.

She kept breathing with him, and after a few minutes she felt herself stop clenching as badly.

"Better?" he breathed, touching his lips to hers, kissing softly.

"Yeah." She tightened her hold on him when a wave of pleasure shot through her. _Oh my god, he felt good._ Warm and full. He was growing inside her. She could feel the expansion and pull, the stiffening. She wanted to move and she tried a gentle rocking like they'd done before. It pulled on her but it felt really good. She felt her cheeks flush. "Dean."

He rocked himself just a little. She bit her lip.

His lips were on her. "Breathe, baby." He said soothingly. "Stay relaxed."

She followed what he said. His tongue pushed her mouth open and slid inside and she cried out at the sensation of being filled by him, pulled onto him. He undulated his hip beneath her, and swallowed her moan as he held the kiss. They ground against each other slowly, shallowly, no actual thrusting. He felt incredible. Her hands slipped against the sweat on his back as she dug her fingers in. She wanted more sensation but when she moved, the pain broke through the pleasure.

Dean wrapped his arms around her and kept her steady. Then he moved his hips again and it felt like being born on a gently bobbing wave, a repeated question on a spot deep inside her. Her heart sped up. She felt like she wanted to cry with the intensity of it. His thumb wiped her cheek and she realized maybe she was crying. Then his hand slid between them and pressed up against her exposed clitoris.

She moaned. He did it again, his other hand pulling her against his chest and those lips kissing hers, forcing his tongue into her, holding her mouth open as his penis held her open and his fingers held her open and her open legs around his waist fought to close. _Open._ All of her held open to receive him.

His fingers gently circled a few times and he rocked harder. There was a little pain but it was so buried by the pleasure that she hardly felt it as her body spasmed around him. Clenching, squeezing him. She sobbed out a moan into his mouth and his tongue retreated letting her finally cry out. His fingers stilled, letting her vaginal muscles clench on him again and again. She was crying into his neck breathless, her legs trembling around him and suddenly she felt Dean coil inside her, swell a bit and spurt with a deep groan. His arms closed around her with a crushing strength. He was panting afterward and when he began to shrink, she pulled off of him with gritted teeth and collapsed onto the mattress.

He flopped down onto his back breathing rapidly. She didn't know what had happened, she lay prone on her stomach, sweating on top of the sheets, her leg trembling with some weird pleasure that still hummed in her. Dean was on his back, his stomach rising and falling with his panting breaths. His penis glistening, flaccid once more and flopped sideways. She buried her face in the pile of the sleeping bags.

"Carrie." Dean's hand was on her and she trembled. "Did I hurt you, baby?"

"No." She said into the blanket.

He tugged on her arm. "C'mere. Cuddle over here."

She crawled sideways over to him and collapsed half on his chest. She felt him gently kiss the top of her head.

She took hold of his brass pendant, rolled it so it caught the light. "What is this?"

He tucked his chin and looked down. "My brother gave it to me when we were kids. Supposed to be protection. "

"And you still wear it? That's sweet."

"Yeah. I guess. Hey, let's not talk about Sammy. He's kind of a boner killer."

She laughed.

"You okay?" He asked. "That still hurt? "

She put the brass amulet down. "It hurt but not as badly. Felt really damned good for a bit."

He stroked her back. "Good. You deserve to feel good all the time baby. I wish I could make it painless."

She kissed his chest, could taste the salt on his skin. "You're incredible."

His hand traced down over the curve of her ass. He paused, gave her cheek a little squeeze. "God, you feel good."

She paused. "Dean..." she felt her heart speed up, knowing before she even vocalized it that it was a mistake.

"Yeah? "

 "I'm not so good at this not getting attached stuff."

She felt him stiffen and his hand came off her ass. She blinked back tears and buried her face in the crook of his arm. _Why did she fucking tell him that?  
_

He went quiet a minute, his hand stroking her back absently.

"I know," he said. 

She didn't know how to take that. Was he annoyed? Accepting?

"I care about you too, sweetheart. I really do." He told her in his rough voice.

She felt her heart skip.

"I just." He sighed. "You know I can't get involved long term with my work."

She felt a weight in the pit of her stomach. "Yeah.  I do."

He took her hand in his and brought it to his lips. He kissed it gently. "Doesn't mean I don't care about you. Just..." he paused. "Was this a mistake lookin' you up?"

She lifted her head to look at him. "What? Oh my god, no! Look me up always."

"I just don't want to hurt you when I gotta go."

"You're not. I mean I wish you'd stay but I get it." Carrie said. "I just. I kept wanting to tell you how much I care about you during...us...and this just slipped out. I'm sorry."

His mouth quirked into his bemused little half smile and he shifted to look at her. "You apologizin' for caring about me?"

She snorted. "Kinda."

He gave a low laugh. "My life is weird, man."

He tucked her hair behind her ear with his pointer finger. "Don't get all sad yet, baby. I still got a day or two, fate willing."

"I just love you and me up here alone. Nothing else in the world." Carrie said, her palm on his bicep.

"I love that too." He said with a sigh. "Bein in you..."

 She traced a circle on his sternum. "What?"

 "It's nice."

"Yeah?"

 "Yeah." He answered. "It's real good."

She furrowed her brow, confused. "Even though you can't really move much?"

"Well I mean it'd be nice to just dog you and go at it don't get me wrong." He replied frankly. "But bein forced to slow down and take my time." He shrugged. "It's nice sometimes. And this might suck for you... but bein' with a tight girl is pretty damned nice."

She laughed. "Oh. Hadn't thought of that. I didn't realize I felt different."

"Yeah. You do. Gettin' in is hard. It feels like there's a wall of muscle tryin' to push me out til you relax. But then that squeeze is nice. And I'm in you bare." He gave a little smile. "That's always freakin fantastic. I don't do that on the road. Don't know who I'm hooking up with. "

She turned around, snuggled her back and ass up to him. He rolled and spooned her. "You make me feel safe," she said.

He paused. "Me too, sweetheart."

She didn't say anything. It hadn't occurred to her that she could make HIM feel safe. How? No pressure on him? Accepting him for who he was? 

They lay safe in each others arms as the sun came up. 

 

 

 


End file.
